It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize