Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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