True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
