So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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