i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
