hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
