He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
