i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
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