he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
your like the ambassador to my penis.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize
