I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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