my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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