I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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