I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
