I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
