Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Randomize
