You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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