I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
