Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
