I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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