I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
