some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
