I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
