yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize
