It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
