I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
