if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize
