But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
