yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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