While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
