I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Be still, my beating vagina.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Randomize
