I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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