No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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