I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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