i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize