She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Randomize
