So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
