i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
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