found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize