Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
