Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize