38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Randomize
