Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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