don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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