Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I wish life had little blips of pornography
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
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