dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I need to align my fucking chakras
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
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