Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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