A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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