Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Randomize