So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
this boner is exhausting
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
