I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
