it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Help. Why am I so naked?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
